Raul Ponce- Ultra Runner

Summary

In this conversation, Raul Ponce shares his journey of rediscovering self-love and purpose. He reflects on his past struggles with identity and the realization that he didn't truly know himself. Through this process of rebuilding, he emphasizes the importance of understanding one's own personality and desires.


Takeaways

I didn't know how to love myself.
I pretended like I did, like most people do.
I was full of I didn't really knew my personality.
I didn't know much about me.
I didn't know what I like.
I didn't know what I was fighting for.
I didn't have a purpose in life.
Now that I'm rebuilding this.
I wanted to do love.
This new role, to do it again.


Keywords

self-love, personal growth, purpose, identity, mental health

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Transcript

Lindsay Hiken (00:00.962)
Hi folks. Welcome to the Ginger and Chocolate podcast. I am your cohost, Lindsay, and I'm flying solo today. Mike is traveling because it is a holiday week, but we have a special guest, Raul Ponce. And I'll just say, I randomly met Raul. We were having some work done at our house and Raul was one of the people here. And I heard he started talking to Josh about all the bikes in the garage. And then it kind of went to

you know, if he does endurance sports and I was in my office and I heard something about ultra runner and I came like bouncing out of the office and was like, do you do those? And he said, yes. So I'm really excited to hear all about his journey in ultra running. So hi Raul. How's it going?

Raul Ponce (00:44.108)
Hi Lindsay, thanks for having me. Doing good.

Lindsay Hiken (00:46.284)
Yeah, good, good. So let's just dive right in. When you were like before back before ultra running and all that stuff, were you an athletic person? Did you play sports? And what did you play if so?

Raul Ponce (01:00.252)
I did. I want to say I was athletic. I was pretty average. I played soccer. I love playing soccer. Soccer was so much fun. was as a child, was like kind of like my go-to place without realizing it that running and being active was such a good thing for your mind. I realize it now. At the time, it was just I was still figuring things out as every child lives, you know what I mean?

Lindsay Hiken (01:14.382)
Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (01:20.483)
Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (01:24.618)
Mm-hmm. Yeah, yeah. And how long ago did you sort of discover ultra running? Or running in general?

Raul Ponce (01:33.72)
Uh, well, I kind of got into, I was really overweight. Um, and I was drinking a lot and, I think it was, um, early 2018. Um, uh, I guess I could just jump into the story. Um, so it was, yeah, it was, uh, my buddy's engagement, um, dinner and, we all went out for drinks to celebrate.

Lindsay Hiken (01:47.488)
Okay, okay.

Yeah, please do.

Raul Ponce (02:03.928)
And I remember going there drinking a lot. Like always, that was part of the culture. I would hang out with people that we engaged in a lot of drinking. And then from time time, we would even use cocaine. That was just part of the culture. So I remember I went to this engagement party and we started drinking a lot of beers. And then we ate a lot. And then I was like the

the food got rid of the bus, so then we started drinking shots. And then that comes into indulging in doing cocaine to keep the party going. So I didn't realize that that day was gonna have such an impact on me. ended up coming back home really late, had to work the next day and I'm 225 pounds, chain smoking cigarettes, I'm just a wreck. I mean, at that time I'm like,

Lindsay Hiken (02:40.77)
Mm-hmm.

Raul Ponce (03:01.77)
mid 30s, early mid 30s. So I wake up in the morning, I have to go to work. I had like, I woke up late, I barely slept. And I remember I had like maybe eight minutes to get ready. And then those eight minutes I'm rushing to get ready to go to work. And I go by the mirror and I look at myself in the mirror and I see the mess. I see my eyes look red. I see how overweight I am.

Lindsay Hiken (03:16.974)
Mm-hmm.

Raul Ponce (03:30.496)
my breath smell like cigarettes and whiskey. I can still feel that cocaine in the back of my throat from the night before. And I'm just thinking to myself, dude, you are going nowhere quick. And out of those eight minutes that I had to get ready, I took four of them to just stare at myself in the mirror and realize, dude, by the time you're 40, you are gonna be such a mess. So.

Lindsay Hiken (03:37.346)
Uhhhh...

Lindsay Hiken (03:50.024)
okay.

Lindsay Hiken (03:56.546)
Mm-hmm.

Raul Ponce (03:58.2)
I made it to work. I don't know how I survived that day. was a miracle. And then when I got home, it still dawned on me. It still dawned on me my actions, how I've been living in my 20s, how I've been drinking so much, how alcohol was something that I glorified that everybody around me glorified it since I was a child. But I didn't want to be part of that anymore. And I needed a change. I had an exercise in years.

Lindsay Hiken (04:01.045)
haha

Lindsay Hiken (04:17.826)
Mm-hmm.

Raul Ponce (04:24.8)
All I did was drink every weekend, hang out with my friends, drink some more, hangover, be hungover at work all the time and it was just gnarly. It was like a cancer that I had that I couldn't get rid of. So I decided that day after work, although I was tired and hungover, I went for a hike. needed clear, I needed to clear my head. needed to see some kind of signs. And I remember I went for a hike. I started eating healthier that night.

And I decided that I was going change my life. But it wasn't that easy. I still had a lot of hiccups. And I would still drink from time to time. But I would always go back to maybe go for a hike. Go for maybe some kind of activity. And then those hikes, it started turning into longer hikes. It was maybe I can run this little section. Maybe I can run to that tree and back.

And then I slowly started changing my life. To the best. I stopped hanging out with some of the same people that I was hanging out with. I started to make better decisions for myself. Because every relationship that I was in, it would just be toxic. Whether it was a woman or if it was with my friends. Everything about it was toxic. And I was just so tired of it. So I'm on this path of trying to be better and trying to

Lindsay Hiken (05:24.685)
Mm.

Lindsay Hiken (05:39.736)
Mm-hmm.

Raul Ponce (05:54.25)
you know, find myself too, learning how to love myself, because I didn't even know how to do that. I didn't even know what my personality was, to be honest with you. I was so lost in this character that was of drinking and partying and laughing, pretending that everything was great when, you know, you have those dark days where you're just wondering what you were doing with your life.

Lindsay Hiken (06:01.837)
Yeah.

Lindsay Hiken (06:15.064)
Yes, I relate to that for sure.

Raul Ponce (06:17.15)
Yeah, so things were starting to get a little better at work. But like I said, I would still had like those like hiccups where I would fall down, where I would go in another bender, where it was like, but I would always go back to running or go to being active. I'm losing weight. I'm starting to build momentum. I'm starting to feel good about myself, but it wasn't easy. I would still get caught up into going out that one night and then one drink turned into a bunch of drinks and

Lindsay Hiken (06:36.558)
Hmm.

Raul Ponce (06:45.496)
Somebody had cocaine and then we indulged in it again and it was a nightmare that I couldn't shake. So I decided to kind of take a break from dating or from drinking and just focusing on working out. I started to meet new friends at the gym, running and I needed a break. I needed a break from, almost like I needed a break from myself, if that makes any sense, from the character that I was.

Lindsay Hiken (06:50.947)
Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (07:01.272)
Hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (07:09.994)
Mm hmm. Yes.

Raul Ponce (07:12.236)
I like, I just, I need to get away from everybody from, I wanted to crawl out of my skin in a weird way. So in that time that I took to myself, I started to get healthier. I started to like the way I looked. I started to drink less and less. It started to really build momentum. So I decided to start dating again, but I decided that if I was going to start dating, it was going to be not going to a bar.

Lindsay Hiken (07:19.886)
Hmm.

Raul Ponce (07:40.696)
It was going to be like, maybe we'll go for a hike, maybe we'll go coffee. And that's when I met my wife, my wife now. I met her and I met her online and I asked if she wanted to go get coffee. And then after that, asked if she wanted to go for a hike. So then I will still drink a little bit here and there, but I realized that every time I found something I like, I would ruin it because I would drink too much.

and that would become an embarrassment. So I really liked my wife and she was nice and she was sweet. And I told myself, you can't be ruined everything you touch with alcohol, man. So I would drink a little bit. She saw me drink maybe a couple of beers here and there, but I really didn't want to mess this up. one time I was having, I went and got burgers with her and I ordered a beer.

Lindsay Hiken (08:13.102)
Hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (08:16.622)
All right.

Lindsay Hiken (08:27.318)
Hmm.

Raul Ponce (08:35.346)
and I was going to have a beer with my burger and I ordered our Corona because I love Coronas back in the day. And so I had a Corona and this Corona tasted different than I can still remember our Corona tastes like but this Corona tasted different. And I'm staring at the Corona halfway through and I talk to myself it was like a switch went off and I said I told myself I'm not going to drink again. This is it.

Lindsay Hiken (08:41.26)
Me too.

Raul Ponce (09:03.584)
And I didn't finish that drink. I threw it away. And it's been three years.

Lindsay Hiken (09:04.11)
Wow. Congrats. That's awesome.

Raul Ponce (09:10.602)
Yeah, it's been three years and it's been three magical years because then the less now that I started focusing on running more, but I didn't have a running group. didn't have I didn't know much about running still. I didn't know that I need to take salt that in I wasn't using the right shoes. So my wife and I got married. I was still running. I was getting I was really getting into running a lot. So my wife and I moved to

Lindsay Hiken (09:20.206)
Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (09:28.506)
Right.

Lindsay Hiken (09:36.814)
Were you doing events at this point? Were you doing like 5Ks, 10Ks, or you're just running it alone?

Raul Ponce (09:44.856)
I was running alone. did do the first thing I went out before when I was still drinking. I trained for a half a marathon and I did it. And right after I finished a half marathon, I went to a bar and got shit house to celebrate. So it wasn't like, yeah. So it was still, I love what it did to me, but I wasn't really signing up to anything until my wife and I moved to Redwood City and we started going to 24 hour fitness.

Lindsay Hiken (09:56.811)
God. Yeah.

Lindsay Hiken (10:12.301)
Okay.

Mm-hmm.

Raul Ponce (10:15.128)
And I would run on the treadmill. We'd run Thursdays and Tuesdays on the treadmill. And there was an older guy that would see me run. And I became buddies with him. And he's like, hey, man, you seem to be a pretty good runner. You got to come and run with us. We got a running group in Skyline, Parisama runners. It was just the name because we run in Parisama on a trail up out of, I thought a half-home bay up in 35. Beautiful spot. Yeah.

Lindsay Hiken (10:35.273)
Lindsay Hiken (10:42.414)
yeah, I know that trail. I know the Paris. Yeah, I love it up there.

Raul Ponce (10:46.36)
Oh, awesome. So I was like, I don't know, man. Maybe you guys are too fast for me. was insecure. I'm gonna kind of want to hold you guys up. He's like, who's that new guy? He can't keep up. And finally, he was so convincing and so sweet that I decided to go. And at the time I was running with another body of mine that on and off, we would kind of run on the streets. We didn't really know what we were doing, but we would like to run in Halfombay. We would run behind Kelly, the street over by the ocean.

Lindsay Hiken (11:09.591)
Mm-hmm.

Raul Ponce (11:16.824)
And this was probably, this is in 2023, we were doing that early 2023. So I was starting to build confidence of how I felt about my running, but I never knew about any of endurance runs or anything until I joined Parisama. And I get to Parisama and I meet these amazing people. mean, there's a huge group and everybody was so sweet, so motivating, so like, oh, asking me questions.

Lindsay Hiken (11:23.416)
Mm-hmm.

Raul Ponce (11:46.168)
And I was insecure and I was kind of shy. I was like, oh, don't know guys. I'm just gonna try to keep up. Thanks for being so cool. And as I was running with these guys, these guys were telling me, this guy was saying, my buddy Graham was saying that he was training for Quicksilver 100K. And I was like, I never heard of 100K. What's that like? I did the math and I'm like, that's 62 miles? Jesus Christ, is that a thing? And I was like, no way. So.

Lindsay Hiken (12:01.698)
Mm-hmm.

Raul Ponce (12:12.504)
I talked to him about it. He's like, I'm training. He was a really good runner, still a really good runner. I still run with him. So I was like, no way. was like, these guys are fascinating. I get to the parking lot. We're having some snacks and some drinks. And then my buddy Kevin said he's getting ready to do Western States. Never heard of Western States. They didn't know what Western States was. And he said Western States is 100 mile. And I said, what? People do that? That's a thing? And I couldn't believe my brain couldn't

Lindsay Hiken (12:29.788)
Lindsay Hiken (12:36.334)
Wow.

Raul Ponce (12:42.616)
I couldn't understand, couldn't, I had a short circuit. I'm like, this is not real. A human body can't run 100 miles. So I started to get really inspired, really motivated. I'm like, wow, these guys are amazing. I got hooked immediately. It was like a drug, a new drug. It was my first night of cocaine again, but in a different scenario. So I remember telling my wife, like, I'm gonna train, I wanna do a good trail marathon.

Lindsay Hiken (12:47.726)
you

Lindsay Hiken (13:03.564)
Yeah.

Raul Ponce (13:12.216)
And she said yeah go for it. She was super motivating and super inspiring super um Always gets behind me puts up with my shenanigans. So I did um, I did Sierra soul Marathon it's on Quicksilver. I don't you're familiar. Yeah guy Troy puts it together. So I did it's a small one and it's a 50k a marathon half a marathon

Lindsay Hiken (13:29.665)
okay, yeah, yep. Nice.

Raul Ponce (13:40.712)
in a 10k I believe and I signed up for the marathon and I've been training hard I was still very insecure I was like I don't know I was I remember I got to the when to the start line and I was asking people like how many times have you run a 50k like my god that's so that's 30 miles that's insane and they're like you're going to be okay so people were very very cool about it so I ended up running that marathon and little did I know I got first place on that one

Lindsay Hiken (13:42.145)
Okay.

Lindsay Hiken (14:04.15)
Yeah, yeah.

Raul Ponce (14:10.772)
Yeah, there wasn't a lot of people, but I still, that just lit up a fire. I'm like, my God, this is amazing. I was just like in a new high. So I come home, my mother-in-law's there, she's the first time she sees me run, I get first place. I'm riding this cloud, right? So I'm like, my God, this is me, this is my identity now. I'm a runner, so.

Lindsay Hiken (14:15.874)
Huh?

Lindsay Hiken (14:27.598)
You

Raul Ponce (14:34.86)
I like okay I gotta take it to the next level now so I signed up for Diablo 50k not really knowing what's going on with Diablo or how hard it is Sign up for Diablo and Diablo was hard that is a hard 50k and it was hot at night

Lindsay Hiken (14:48.744)
I'm sure.

Do you run up Mount Diablo? mean, where is it? It's over that way in the East Bay. Okay.

Raul Ponce (14:58.104)
Yeah, it's in the East Bay. So we get there and it's a lot of elevation. It's like if you want to train and get your climbing Diablo, that's where you want to be. Diablo and El Sato Party. I talked to Josh about it. Josh has done Diablo. Yeah. And I know they have a bike event there.

Lindsay Hiken (15:02.24)
Yeah, I was going to say.

Lindsay Hiken (15:09.806)
Yeah, I've ridden my bike up to the top of it a few times and the. Yeah, OK, yeah, yeah, it's it's. Yep, it's pretty gnarly.

Raul Ponce (15:21.29)
Yeah, it is. it's like, would, yeah, you know, the Diablo will put some lead on your pencil, excuse my language, you know what I mean? Yeah, it'll get you going. So I did it. And I didn't say I like did really good, but I survived it. But it still, it kept the appetite going. So one of my good runners, who's my pacer, paced me on RDL recently.

Lindsay Hiken (15:27.756)
Hahaha

Raul Ponce (15:47.288)
And I met her at Prisma my friend Terry she said she's very familiar with all the runs and everything very experienced runner And she's like well you did Diablo. How about you do 50 miler? I don't know 50 miles. That's like That's the next level and she's like well muck is coming up and this is last year And she's like muck 50 miles you can do it. I was like, okay, maybe

I know, was very, 50 miles going from 30 to 50, that's a big jump. So anyway, she did such a good job of convincing me that I jumped to do muck. Muck is Marin. It's a Marin ultra challenge. It's a 50 miler, it's 9,000 feet of elevation and they do it every March. Yeah. Yeah, it's a, yes, I think it's over 9,000. It's a hard 50 miler.

Lindsay Hiken (16:19.139)
Yeah.

Lindsay Hiken (16:25.144)
Where is that? Where is that right?

Lindsay Hiken (16:34.742)
Wow, okay, that's a lot of elevation.

Lindsay Hiken (16:41.794)
Yeah, sounds like.

Raul Ponce (16:43.544)
It is and it's cold and it was raining and it was wet and it was miserable. Windy, everything. You were running, you were trying to hide your face from the wind. yeah, no, was a, that was quite the party. So I signed up, I did it. After mile 40, my niece was shot. It was such a grind and I can still remember the agony and the pain that I was going through, but I survived it.

Lindsay Hiken (16:54.528)
Lindsay Hiken (17:05.55)
Mm-hmm.

Raul Ponce (17:13.368)
And I'm like, okay, maybe I need a break. But there's a little devil on my shoulder again, my friend Terry again saying, hey Raul, Quicksilver, you already trained for Muck? And I was like, and this is the same year, this is last year. So she talks to me about Quicksilver and I'm like, I don't know, that's a lot of elevation, it's gonna be hot. She's like, you're training, you already did Muck, come on Raul, you're there. And I'm like, all right, I'll sign up for Quicksilver.

Lindsay Hiken (17:29.166)
Okay.

Lindsay Hiken (17:42.274)
And when is that? What time of year is that Quicksilver? okay. So you did one in March and now you're looking at another one in May. Okay. Wow.

Raul Ponce (17:44.883)
Quicksilver is in May, so it gets... And then I jump into Quicksilver in May. yeah, she just didn't want the party to end. So we go to... We sign up for Quicksilver and again, it was a survival. You have to... I think I had one of my buddies pace me for that, because they pace you after mild... What is it? Mild 30... They pace you for... Oh, after mild 40, you can get a pacer.

Lindsay Hiken (18:14.258)
Okay, okay.

Raul Ponce (18:15.49)
So my buddy paced me. I survived. remember I finished Quicksilver. It took me 15 hours and some change. And I remember I was waiting for my friend to finish. She finished probably like half an hour after I did and I wanted to walk to give her a hug and I couldn't walk over. So my wife had to help me and hold my hand so I can walk from where I was sitting to give my friend a hug because Quicksilver broke me like that.

Lindsay Hiken (18:25.229)
Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (18:45.217)
Yeah.

Raul Ponce (18:46.28)
And so here I am the moment I'm still going. So I finished that and I'm thinking to myself, okay, I need a break. Like I need to just take it easy, but I'm still loving to run. And so it comes May, it's over and it's June. And I go another run with my friends and here's my friend Terry again, like, Raul, there's Tahoe 100 TRT. And I'm like, I don't know Terry.

Lindsay Hiken (19:13.602)
Yeah.

Raul Ponce (19:17.103)
She's like, you already did muck, you already did quicksilver, look at this bucko that you get. And it's a beautiful bell bucko. And then not only, I was like, I don't know, I feel like a hundred miles, that's just too much, I can't do a hundred miles. she sent me pictures of the bell bucko that you get when you do TRT 100 in Tahoe. And I'm like, I don't know, that's a hundred, that's a lot of elevation. She's like, come on, Raul, you like wearing cowboy boots, you like wearing a cowboy hat, it'll go great with your outfit.

Lindsay Hiken (19:41.902)
Sounds like it.

Raul Ponce (19:43.734)
She's a great salesman by the way, she can talk me into anything. And so I was like, you know what, why not? So here we go again, just done Muck, Quicksilver, and let's saddle up the pony again and let's go.

Lindsay Hiken (19:59.247)
What time of year is TRT then? so these are all pretty, yeah.

Raul Ponce (20:01.908)
in July.

This is within each other, so within a couple of months of jumping from my first 50 miler to my first 100 miler.

Lindsay Hiken (20:12.586)
Yeah, that's very, very close together. Wow, how impressive.

Raul Ponce (20:15.264)
Yeah, yeah. Thank you. It was just, I think I had a lot of fire in me from being this other character, being a drinker, being known almost as an alcoholic. And I almost felt like I had something to prove. So yeah, my friend Terry was in my year, but I also felt that I wanted to shake this persona of who I was so bad that I was willing to put in the work and go through any suffering that I needed to go to mold and be like a caterpillar.

so I can become this butterfly for lack of better words. I was so driven. I was so driven to be a better human being and to not be known as Raul the alcoholic. I wanted to be Raul, the guy that works hard and is dedicated and is responsible and is not making any excuses. So that's what kept me going. That's what keeps me going today. So I sign off for TRT.

Lindsay Hiken (20:49.453)
Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (20:57.26)
Mm.

Lindsay Hiken (21:00.589)
Right.

Lindsay Hiken (21:06.83)
Hmm.

Raul Ponce (21:13.112)
a TRT, 100 miles, that heat, that elevation, that was like nothing before. I got a Pacers, I prepare, but still you might be prepared, but it's nothing. Like at mild, I got altitude sickness, the medics came to me and they said, I wanted them to pull me to be honest with you. I wanted them to tell me to stop.

Lindsay Hiken (21:19.63)
You're right.

Lindsay Hiken (21:32.227)
Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (21:38.85)
Yeah.

Raul Ponce (21:39.991)
because I was so over it. was going through so it was everything, everything hurt. My soul hurt. I didn't know a soul can hurt. And it really hurt. But the medic said, no, you can't. You feel good. You're great, man. I've seen people that look way worse than you. They're moving like they keep pretty much call me a pussy. Yeah. And I needed to hear that. I want to shake that. If I wish I can see this medic again so can shake his hand. So I.

Lindsay Hiken (21:45.612)
Ha ha ha.

Lindsay Hiken (21:57.999)
no. Right.

Lindsay Hiken (22:06.786)
Yeah.

Raul Ponce (22:09.096)
keep grinding you know I my first pacer did a great job and I get to my second pacer and he's motivating me and he's pushing me and it's like we're going it's mile 76 I've never gone to that far and here we go and it's it's we have 36 hours to finish this race and so I'm doing okay in time

Lindsay Hiken (22:31.915)
Okay.

Raul Ponce (22:35.954)
So I started early in the morning, the sun came up, the sun went down and the sun came up again and we're still plugging away. So I'm pretty broken by this time. I get to mile 87 and it's hot again and it's probably like 10 in the morning by this time and I just come to a stop on the trail and my pacer looks at me and he's like, what's wrong? And I'm like, I don't know, I can't move. He's like, what do need?

Lindsay Hiken (22:41.482)
Mm, probably.

Lindsay Hiken (22:50.437)
huh.

Lindsay Hiken (23:02.797)
Hmm.

Raul Ponce (23:04.094)
And he's like, don't, I'm like, I don't know. He's like, are you, do you need water? No. Do you need painkillers? No. Do you need food? No. He's like, then we move. We keep moving. And I just wanted him to like, I wanted him to pull me out, but he said, no, we move. So I keep moving. We get to the final A station and he's putting ice on me. And I look at one of the people working at the A station and he looks at me, he's, he's giggling cause he sees how broken I am.

Lindsay Hiken (23:14.307)
Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (23:25.218)
Yeah.

Lindsay Hiken (23:31.716)
huh.

Raul Ponce (23:31.865)
And I look at him, I make contact with him and I'm like, I will never do this shit again ever. And then he starts laughing. He's like, you'll be back. I promise you, you'll be back. I'm bringing to myself. There's nothing in this world that can make me come back to this hell. And it's mile 93. We keep moving. We're making good time. We're going to make it. So I get to like a mile 95 and another gear kicks in. Something happens. I see the finish line and there's like

Lindsay Hiken (23:36.514)
Ha ha ha ha

Lindsay Hiken (23:47.0)
Mm.

Lindsay Hiken (23:58.958)
Uh-uh.

Raul Ponce (24:03.387)
like something in you. Like my body knew at this point that I wasn't going to quit. So it started to give me more. So then we're pushing and we're pushing and when we finish in what a feeling. 31 hours and I'm just in another cloud. I can't explain it. Like at those times I was able to take the soul out of my body and hold it in my hand. And I never had that experience before. I never accomplished something that

Lindsay Hiken (24:09.123)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Wow. I'm sure.

Raul Ponce (24:31.948)
great in my life. was always known as just kind of a fuck up to be honest with you for lack of better words people would always just thought little of me and they were in the right. I would lie about why I couldn't make it to work because I was drunk because I wanted to keep drinking in the morning and then I'm just finished a hundred miles like it was I mean thinking about it I still get goosebumps I get emotional it's like wow I never

Lindsay Hiken (24:33.09)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (24:38.082)
Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (24:42.958)
Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (24:48.23)
Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (24:51.83)
Yeah.

Lindsay Hiken (24:57.57)
Yeah.

Raul Ponce (24:59.64)
People were proud of me and nobody has been proud of me before. My family was proud of me, my sister, my brother. I was like, oh my God. They look up to me. People look up to me now like, what? That's Alberta. Why would you look up to me? I still feel imposter syndrome today. So even when I meet some of my wife's friends, they're like, oh, I hear you run 100 miles. And I'm like, yeah, but

Lindsay Hiken (25:01.55)
Right.

Lindsay Hiken (25:17.716)
Mm-hmm. Yeah, yeah.

Raul Ponce (25:28.672)
And they're like, can we talk to you? And I'm like, why would you want to talk to me? Like, they're like, yeah, no, let's talk to me. So what do you do? So I'm still dealing with that to this day. So anyway, that journey opened up doors in my mind of how to keep going. Opened up doors of how to be a better person, how to be a better friend, how to be a better coworker, how to be a good husband, how to how to try to be better, how to still I still have issues.

Lindsay Hiken (25:32.715)
Yeah.

Raul Ponce (25:57.251)
But it gives me the tools of how to deal with my issues, how through hard work you can accomplish anything. So it starts to create mold this person that I thought that I would never be. So it becomes incredible. To this day I wake up in the morning and I wake up in the morning every day to go work out, to go lift, or to go run. So once I accomplish TRT, I still sign up for like double dipsey.

Lindsay Hiken (26:09.516)
Yeah, yeah.

Lindsay Hiken (26:18.947)
Mm-hmm.

Raul Ponce (26:24.972)
that's up in my range and stuff like that, fun runs and stuff. So I have this bond with my running friends, with my lifting friends, with everybody, with my coworkers, Tyler, who you met, who I love to death, beautiful human being, to all these people that are in my life that have such bond. And it's because I was open to new ideas, new ideas of running, new ideas of being healthy, that I wasn't married to my ideas anymore, that I wasn't in stubborn and glorifying alcohol.

Lindsay Hiken (26:25.611)
huh. yeah.

Raul Ponce (26:54.304)
Living by the old Hank Williams songs and in how I grew up all my life saying that you can only have fun with alcohol. That's a bunch of BS. You can have so much fun without it. More fun, yeah. And then you can actually make good connections with people. You can be more open-minded. The more I work out, the more I detach myself from some of the ideas that I had. The more I'm open to new ideas. The more I'm open for people to teach me to learn.

Lindsay Hiken (26:56.814)
Yeah.

Lindsay Hiken (27:06.698)
More fun. More fun without it.

Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (27:19.0)
Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (27:22.679)
Mm-hmm.

Raul Ponce (27:23.062)
because I still have a lot to learn. Anyway.

Lindsay Hiken (27:25.27)
Yeah, that's a beautiful story. And I think I want to finish the end. want to hear about Rio de Lago. I know that that's coming up soon. But just want to touch on something about how you've connected your running. think it's really neat how you've connected your running to a higher purpose, you know, becoming a different person and being open to new ideas and being open to a different identity than that partier.

I can relate to that being sort of like the identity of myself as like, drink wine and I'm a fun girl when I'm out there drinking wine and hanging out. And that's not true. That wasn't true. It wasn't fun. It was ugly. It was really ugly. But that was the identity that I held onto. And I think this lifestyle of not letting go of that identity and not drinking.

Raul Ponce (27:54.648)
100%.

Lindsay Hiken (28:22.158)
or using drugs and moving towards any kind of physical movement. mean, you and I talk about endurance sports, but anyone listening, even if you're not doing big, long endurance sports, I think that any kind of movement can open up these doors, like we're all said in your mind. And the other thing I wanted to say is I totally relate to that feeling when you finish the 100 miles of like,

Raul Ponce (28:25.42)
Right. Right.

Lindsay Hiken (28:48.11)
I can accomplish more than I thought I could. This was my experience when I did an Iron Man was like as I was coming down the chute, you know, it was like, oh, I can actually do more than I think. Think that I can't. have I have some stuff within me that I can tap into that I didn't know was there. And it's for me, it was a feeling of not only accomplishment, but also just like this feeling of kind of being a little bit giddy of like.

Raul Ponce (28:53.261)
for sure.

Lindsay Hiken (29:17.142)
You know, there I'm a different person than I thought I was. I have more there, more to offer. However, I crossed the finish line and my coach was there and the team manager was there. Josh was there. And the first thing out of my mouth was I'm never doing this again. That was the first thing out of my mouth. And right now I'm not, you know, I'm not doing triathlon because I am busy with work. You know, it's hard to do a three sport. So I'm focusing on running and one of my

Raul Ponce (29:34.486)
Haha, yep. Yep.

Raul Ponce (29:44.792)
100%.

Lindsay Hiken (29:46.115)
bucket list items is to run not 100 miles, but to do a 50K and maybe a 50 mile. I want to do the AR 50, the American River 50. That's, know, and we'll see what my body says, but that's kind of on my bucket list. So when I hear people like you going from, you know, overweight, drunk to long distance runner and not very long time, I mean, it wasn't.

Raul Ponce (29:54.486)
Okay.

Raul Ponce (30:05.837)
Yes.

Lindsay Hiken (30:10.126)
that's the time span, the timeline of you going from one to the other is actually relatively short, I feel like. And it's kind of amazing. okay, so keep telling me your story. You finished the Tahoe 100 and from there, is that when you sign up for Rio de Lago or were there other races in between?

Raul Ponce (30:30.776)
So that was last year and then I wanted to repeat this year what I did last year. I wanted to beat my times I Yeah, I built like I started to create this character That I was falling in love with and and that was myself I started to rebuild my relationship with myself Which it was very important for me to learn how to love myself

Lindsay Hiken (30:36.298)
Okay.

Lindsay Hiken (30:49.752)
you

Raul Ponce (30:58.646)
because I think all through my life I didn't know how to love myself. I pretended like I did, like most people do, but I was full of shit. I didn't know how to love myself. I didn't really knew my personality like I said earlier before. I didn't know much about me to be completely honest with you. I didn't know what I like. I didn't know what I was fighting for. didn't know, I didn't have a purpose in life I felt like. So now that I'm rebuilding this Raul,

Lindsay Hiken (31:02.68)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Right.

Raul Ponce (31:28.044)
this new role, I wanted to do it again. I wanted to do it with love, this new person. So, did mock again. I finished an hour and a half faster. And then signed up for Quicksilver. Quicksilver was so much fun this year. I did it last year in 13 hours, I think, and it was 14 minutes. And this year I did it in 13 hours. So I did it two hours faster this year.

Lindsay Hiken (31:36.162)
Wow.

Lindsay Hiken (31:54.08)
Okay.

Raul Ponce (31:57.001)
And then TRT was canceled so we couldn't do TRT so I signed up for Cool Moon. Cool Moon is a race in Auburn. It's a small race but you do a bunch of loops, 100 miles. So you do like some loops and you jump in another one and you do loops and it was a short race but there was very good people that I met there that when you meet people on those trails those are the most beautiful human beings you can possibly meet, man.

Lindsay Hiken (32:01.263)
Mm.

what's that?

Okay.

Okay.

Raul Ponce (32:25.72)
I have immediately feel like some kind of soul connection with these folks. So I did Cool Moon and I did TRT in 31 hours and I did Cool Moon in 24 hours. 24 hours and 17 minutes. I was sixth place overall. So I'm starting to really take my running seriously at that point and everything and my buddy who I became good friends with who I met at the gym, he was deadlifting. He was a pretty strong guy. So I got on more into running.

Lindsay Hiken (32:26.039)
Agreed.

Lindsay Hiken (32:37.314)
Wow.

Lindsay Hiken (32:41.196)
Nice.

Raul Ponce (32:54.808)
So he wanted to do RDL and I told him I would do it with him. But after Cool Moon, I was like, man, I need a break. I don't know if I want to do RDL. I'm just like, I feel kind of beat. I started to have hip issues because I did a backyard ultra. And I forgot to tell you that last November I did a backyard ultra. It's at the same time, a week after RDL. And my hip kinda got messed up. I did 50 miles and I...

Lindsay Hiken (32:57.102)
Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (33:19.616)
Really?

Raul Ponce (33:23.768)
I quit at mile 50. My hip was giving me too much trouble. Now I got that fixed so I was able to move forward. So now I'm going back to doing RDL this year. My buddy signed up. I summed up and I figured if I'm gonna do it, I gotta take it seriously. If I wanna do it, I wanna do it sub 24 because I wanted that bell buckle. Let's say sub 24.

Lindsay Hiken (33:31.022)
Mm.

Lindsay Hiken (33:38.99)
Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (33:43.278)
Uh-huh. Let me, so for those who don't know, why don't you just tell them a little bit about what our deal is, where it is. It's called Rio Del Lago, tell a little bit about the course and where it is.

Raul Ponce (33:51.329)
Okay.

Raul Ponce (33:55.865)
Rio de Lago is in Auburn in Auburn, California, close to Grass Valley. It's a hundred miler. It's a popular race. I think it's got like 14, 15,000 feet of elevation. And it's a beautiful course. I underestimate how beautiful it was going to be. And I think it's close to like 300 runners that signed up for it. They also do a 50K, I believe.

Lindsay Hiken (34:21.524)
wow.

Lindsay Hiken (34:25.908)
Okay.

Raul Ponce (34:26.328)
So it's a beautiful, I think it's been going on for a while too. They say it's like a good first 100 but it's not that easy. It's a tough one. It's so tough.

Lindsay Hiken (34:30.839)
Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (34:37.582)
Yeah, 14,000 feet of climbing and then Auburn isn't at sea level, I don't think. Isn't there a little bit of a little bit of elevation there? Yeah. Okay, so that's that's interesting for a first 50 mile. I mean, 100 miler sounds.

Raul Ponce (34:44.296)
No, it's yeah, you start with a little bit of elevation. Yeah. Uh-huh. And yeah.

Yeah, people have said that it's not one of the hardest, which I believe is I've seen some really hard ones that like in, for Leadville, for example, in Denver, some of those are like really pretty extreme ones. This was a solid one, it's a solid 100. So I started training for it. I still was almost part of me, in a way was hoping that I didn't, that I could pull out of it just because I felt like I was burning myself out a little bit. But I'm so glad I did it.

Lindsay Hiken (35:03.713)
Mm-hmm, yeah.

Raul Ponce (35:24.426)
So my buddy was training really, really hard to do it, his first 100. He's done 50-Milers before, and he did Quicksilver also with me this year. So I didn't want him to do it by himself. So I was like, I'll join you. If you do it, I'll do it. So this is the very beginning, since that, in the morning, there was some electricity there and something beautiful about that race. Meeting people at the hotel where I was staying.

just amazing laughter, happiness, healthy people with good personalities. You can just tell them that these are people that can't wait to get up in the morning and just be go-getters, you and I feed off of that. I love that people that have that kind of energy. So since the very beginning, since the dinners we were having before of it, we just knew that we were gonna have a magical time at RDL. RDL, it was gonna be beautiful. You can feel it. So sure enough, my buddy and I start and we go slow.

Lindsay Hiken (36:01.964)
Yeah. Yeah.

Lindsay Hiken (36:12.3)
Mm-hmm.

Raul Ponce (36:20.664)
because I'm now at this point this will be my third 100 so we're going slow we're taking it easy we're cruising we're having a good time and then we we figured like once we passed the 50 mile mark we can start pushing if we have the legs for it and my buddy stayed with me although he wasn't uh he hadn't had the experience that I had he was pushing hard and I couldn't shake him I thought I was going to be able to leave him behind earlier but negative Ghost Rider

Lindsay Hiken (36:35.662)
Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (36:43.437)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Raul Ponce (36:48.984)
He was holding on to me and I was trying to shake him. I still haven't talked to about that, I've told him about it, but into that detail, but I couldn't shake him. When I would get to the A stations and I would see my wife and the crew, were like, dude, man, he's right behind you. He's hunting you down. That was fun and I was very proud of him. I was very, very proud of him. we go through this motion through these...

Lindsay Hiken (36:49.102)
You

Raul Ponce (37:14.54)
walls, whatever you call it, and I ended up finishing RDL 23 hours and nine minutes. So I met my goal of getting that sub 24 and everybody was waiting there for us. I mean, this is like at three in the morning. A bunch of my friends are waiting there with my wife and giving me hugs and it is so emotional, man. Like I just, wanted to, when I crossed the finish line, I wanted to cry.

Lindsay Hiken (37:20.604)
nice. Nice.

Lindsay Hiken (37:26.616)
belt buckle.

Raul Ponce (37:43.319)
I wanted to let stuff out. I wanted to just tell everybody how much I love them, how much they mean to me, how much that when I feel like I'm still insecure and that I'm not that special, but thank you for being there. know, if that makes any sense, there's still part of me that feels like I'm not worth all that attention or all that praise. You know, there's still part of me that still struggles with that. But.

Lindsay Hiken (38:02.158)
Mmm.

Lindsay Hiken (38:07.618)
Yeah, yeah.

Raul Ponce (38:08.376)
I'm so thankful. I'm just like, couldn't like, I just hugged everybody and I told everybody how much I loved them. There's a video of me crossing the fountain and I'm just telling people how much I love them. I was like, I love you, man. Thank you so much. But I told my pacer, I gave him a hug and I was like, I love you so much,

Lindsay Hiken (38:25.568)
so much better than the drunken, I don't know if you ever got drunk and did the whole like, love you man, like, this is such a...

Raul Ponce (38:31.252)
Of course, of course, man, can't, yeah. I can write a book, yeah, this thick, of the things you shouldn't do when you're drinking or how bad it is to drink, yeah.

Raul Ponce (38:44.644)
So yeah, so survival, RDL, and then not only did I survive, I'm starting to thrive with these relationships now that I have with these people and with this still like finding who I am, but like learning how to love myself, learning to say it's okay, that maybe I am worth the time. Maybe I am worth the praise. Maybe I could help somebody with my story. Like I went from being.

Lindsay Hiken (38:54.51)
Mmm.

Lindsay Hiken (39:10.048)
Yeah.

Raul Ponce (39:12.112)
225 pounds and my face looked like a fat red balloon to being 164 pounds and being able to run 100 miles under 24 hours. Like maybe that can inspire somebody that even if you think that it's too late, it's never too late. I promise you if you put those walking shoes on and you walk out that door, you will go further than you think you will. You know, and yeah.

Lindsay Hiken (39:21.248)
Yeah. absolutely.

Lindsay Hiken (39:31.01)
Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (39:38.253)
That's inspiring. That's definitely inspiring. I have to say personally, right now, I'm just trying to come back from my run and I haven't been running consistently and I had ankle surgery and blah, blah, blah.

Raul Ponce (39:41.377)
It is.

Lindsay Hiken (39:51.695)
When I hear a story like yours, I'm like, okay, because what's happening for me is that I'm motivated to start running again. However, I've been letting things in life get in the way of doing that, you know, which is, you know, things happen, but at the same time, like I could.

be more intentional about making sure that the run is getting in there. And I'm not. then on the weekend, I go for a run and I'm dying. Do you know what I mean? It's short. I don't have the endurance. I have the strength because I do strength workout four days a week, which is good for my body to keep me healthy. But at the same time, where's that run? Because you can't be a weekend warrior. You can, but you're not going to get very far. It's really painful.

Raul Ponce (40:15.8)
Sure. Yeah. Right. Right.

Raul Ponce (40:36.588)
Right now, you have to be committed. Right.

Lindsay Hiken (40:41.686)
I appreciate you sharing the story because it reminds me there's a reason why I want to do this and go longer. And I need to be a little more consistent. You got to be consistent.

Raul Ponce (40:49.203)
Right. Right. 100 percent. It's like it's more about for me, I look at it now running or working on like brushing my teeth. I'll have a sour taste in my mouth if I don't go for a run or if I don't go. It became part of my identity now. It's who I am. It's part of who I fell in love with. It's part of who I also am married to. And I got to be loyal to myself. Part of like my what I want to be in nothing in this world is more attractive than hard work.

Lindsay Hiken (41:09.432)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (41:18.85)
Right.

Raul Ponce (41:18.872)
You want to build some kind of confidence. You want to feel attractive, work hard. Nothing will guarantee you that nothing will be more attractive and more sexy than hard work. Yeah, it is. When you see somebody working hard, they are attractive. There's some kind of romance to that. And dedication. That's how, like, you want to build confidence. You want to find out who you are.

Lindsay Hiken (41:30.959)
That's true. That is true.

Lindsay Hiken (41:44.002)
Mm-hmm.

Raul Ponce (41:47.863)
you put in the work. I had to put away my old drinking songs away and I started listening to motivational things from like David Goggins or Jaco, somebody that says you gotta work hard, you gotta put in the work and then, and at first if you might wanna do it for somebody else to impress something, maybe that could be a step, but at end of the day you're gonna do it for yourself and you're gonna, even when nobody's watching, you're still gonna be working hard and you are gonna build that relationship with yourself.

Lindsay Hiken (41:57.516)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Lindsay Hiken (42:10.465)
Right.

Raul Ponce (42:17.194)
and you're gonna fall in love with yourself. Cause there's nothing more beautiful in this world than loving yourself, man. That's the only way you can love something else, is if you have love for yourself.

Lindsay Hiken (42:19.534)
Hmm.

Lindsay Hiken (42:23.489)
That's true.

Yeah, you're 100 % right. You're 100 % right. So I know for you had mentioned to me when we were talking before that you have a new phase in your life. Are you moving out of the country still?

Raul Ponce (42:38.71)
yeah, I'm to Australia. My wife and I are moving to Australia. Her dad had a heart attack not too long ago. He's doing good now. But since my wife and I, we don't have any kids. We have a couple dogs that we're gonna take with us. We wanna keep growing and we wanna meet people, people that challenge our ideas, people from...

Lindsay Hiken (42:54.349)
Nice.

Raul Ponce (43:02.668)
that look at the world different. I love meeting people like that, man. I love saying like, what? You look at it that way? I love to grow. I'm just in that journey of growing, of finding more about love, about how I am not married to my ideas. Please tell me something new and I will listen. So my wife and I were, she's Australia, my wife. My wife was actually born in Poland and moved to Australia when she was a little girl with her family.

Lindsay Hiken (43:07.694)
you

Nice.

Lindsay Hiken (43:19.266)
That's amazing. And she's Australian. Is that right? Okay.

Lindsay Hiken (43:29.952)
Okay. Okay.

Raul Ponce (43:30.772)
And now her family is in Australia and we want to go spend some time with them and travel with them. Maybe go to Europe, meet new people and keep. What's the word I'm looking for? Keep growing with this life, this journey that we have and trying to be the best you can be. And maybe if you see somebody going through something rough.

Lindsay Hiken (43:52.418)
Nice.

Raul Ponce (43:58.945)
Maybe you can say something. Maybe you can get to lift them up. Maybe you can't don't judge them. Be like, hey man, I know what it's like to drink. I know what it's like to not make it to work. I know what it's like to lie about why I couldn't make it to work. All that nonsense, I've lived it. So maybe come hang out, you know? Maybe let's go for a walk. So yeah.

Lindsay Hiken (44:17.1)
Yeah, yeah, that's really cool. Have you looked up any races in Australia? Are you thinking of keeping this going or?

Raul Ponce (44:24.284)
Yes, 100%. I've looked at races in Poland, I've looked at races in Croatia, I looked at races in New Zealand. I'm actually meeting up with some of my friends in Europe in August to do part of the UTMB from France, Switzerland to Italy. I told my wife now, now that I'm on journey, that for my 45th birthday, I want to come back to the States and do more 240.

Lindsay Hiken (44:34.446)
Uh-huh.

Lindsay Hiken (44:41.382)
yeah, yeah, Nice.

Lindsay Hiken (44:52.971)
Okay, ooh, wow.

Raul Ponce (44:54.476)
So I want to take it to that level. so then I always want to like have like the little carrot dangling in front of me. I always want to chase that carrot. so, and I know it's hard, I've surprised myself before.

Lindsay Hiken (44:57.154)
Geez Louise.

Lindsay Hiken (45:01.396)
Mm-hmm.

That's amazing. Wow, that's a 240 is who.

Yeah, yeah, I have a friend who's done a couple 200. She was trying to do a triple crown and I can't remember which races they are, but it's three 200s and they're in pretty close succession. One of the races in Tahoe and I know that she, yeah, she had a.

Raul Ponce (45:23.927)
Yeah.

He had no Tahoe 200.

Lindsay Hiken (45:32.343)
she tore something major where she couldn't keep running. She'd done one of the 200 already and then she went to Tahoe and it was one of those deals where like she got a tear in like, like her quad or something, like a serious tear and somebody, she was out in middle of nowhere and between, and she couldn't really walk and yeah, it's gnarly. But it speaks to the trail running community that somebody who was a nurse,

Raul Ponce (45:48.381)
yeah.

Raul Ponce (45:52.278)
Yeah, those are gnarly.

Lindsay Hiken (46:01.065)
stopped their race or might have made an appointment in a doctor, stopped their race, came over to her, did a, you know, kind of an assessment. was like, basically like your race has got to be done. Like you're going to, cannot, because my friend was trying to hobble along and it was like, this person was like, this is a serious situation where you're going to do irreparable damage and helped her walk.

Raul Ponce (46:22.25)
Yes, yes.

Lindsay Hiken (46:25.418)
all the way to the next aid station, even though they were in the middle of their race and they weren't injured, they helped my friend get all the way to the next aid station with this like torn quad, which is just so, so amazing. And then they took off and finished their race, but that speaks a lot to the trail running community, how loving they are.

Raul Ponce (46:34.232)
100 %

Raul Ponce (46:43.436)
They're amazing. They're just the most giving people, the most, the biggest hearts I've met have been in those trails. Yeah, it's amazing. It's amazing. I can't wait to the people that I'm gonna meet. I'm excited. I tell my wife sometimes that she thinks I'm goofy. And I'm like, I'm so excited about the people that I haven't met. And so, yeah, I'm like, there's somebody right now getting ready to work that I haven't met.

Lindsay Hiken (46:50.39)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. That's really cool.

Lindsay Hiken (47:04.43)
That's a great way to look at it.

Raul Ponce (47:10.786)
that our lives are gonna meet and we're gonna have a good time.

Lindsay Hiken (47:11.054)
Yeah

That's right. Well, that's a perfect way to end the episode. Just I appreciate how positive you've been and sharing your journey. And I know it's going to help others, not just, you know, motivation to run, but also the story of getting from the, you know, the sort of drunken persona to somebody who's interested in other people. I mean, I know from my experiences, drinking is

a very self-centered, selfish activity. there's no concern for other people, their needs or feelings or anything. so going from that and the journey to being like this caring, open person is pretty inspirational. And I really appreciate you coming on here and that with us. Okay, so folks, we're gonna end here. I think after Raul has spent a couple...

Raul Ponce (47:43.724)
most selfish thing.

Nope.

Raul Ponce (47:59.98)
Thanks for having me.

Lindsay Hiken (48:08.994)
you know, a year getting to know other people. I want to have them back on and hear what Australia and Europe is like. so looking forward to hearing that part of your journey. But for now, we're going to say goodbye. If you want to support the show, please share us with another friend, someone who's interested in.

Raul Ponce (48:18.274)
Absolutely.

Lindsay Hiken (48:28.778)
a sobriety journey, someone who's interested in hearing about running, someone who just needs something entertaining to listen to. Just share this episode or any episode that you like with them and we will see you next week. Bye.